Posts in Mental
Change Your Tone: Speak Gently to Yourself

I was upset, to say the least. I decided to trust the knowledge of the backroads and find every avenue possible to get me to my destination on time. Long story short, I was late, and the emotions came flooding. Frustrated, upset, disappointed, hurt, confused, and helpless. All these emotions were spilling out of me so much that after almost a year of not having panic attacks, one came.

Instead of telling myself, "hey Abigail, you did everything you could do to get this errand done properly and on time," I flooded my thoughts with thoughts like, "why is this happening on a day like today?" Thoughts like, "wow, only on a day that I need things to go right," "I should've done this and that," "she's going to be upset with me because I let her down when she needed me," "she's not going to trust me to get this done ever again," and of course, "I've failed her."

When you mess up, when you fall short in any way, picture your parents (or your favorite parent cause we all know some of us are way too side selective). How would they speak to you? How have they talked to you in the past when you mess up? Imagine that kind, understanding, and loving voice. And if your parents don't do that then do the bonus and imagine how God talks to you.

God knows that you're going to fall short before you do. Remember that while Jesus was on the cross he saw all your mess-ups and still said, forgive them. Jesus knew all too well about your shortcomings and sins, and he always chooses to love you. Now you get to love on you. You get to speak kindness and love and hope into your life. And this is especially important in moments when it's hardest to see the best in you.

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Proper Healing: He's Got You

"There's nothing more powerful for your growth and future than to allow yourself to grow and heal properly in the arms of God."

- Mom

The bond and the relationship that you allow to grow with God is natural, transformative, healing, and altogether more compelling than anything life itself can produce. It is the exact relationship your soul has always yearned for because it is the only way to tap into true peace, joy, and gladness.

No matter what you did, what has been done to you, where you've been, who you've been, and what anyone says about you, your identity and the core of who you are is as visible to the Lord as the very skin you bear. God knows you and has seen everything you consider painful, disgusting, or awful about yourself. Yes, those things in your story that you hide from people; he sees them all. And even after witnessing it all, he chooses to love on you and care for you to the point of not only healing your body but your spirit. If this isn't what love is, then I don't believe love exists.

[…]who are was always inside of you. But until you realize that, you will fail and find no joy wherever you go. By allowing the Holy Spirit to teach me how to praise the Lord in all seasons, I've learned that the essence of who I am (the part that I aim to continue growing into) is found in who he is.

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The Pain That Became My Superpower

He did what he did to me. He did what he did to my psyche. He did what he did to my emotions. He did what he did to...my body.

[…]Be honest and kind to yourself. No matter who hurt you or what has happened to you, please take care of the experience and gather those lessons. Face your pain head-on. You may be like me, who had to let my family, friends, and counselors in my healing process. It's alright.

Do not (I'm dead serious) be the person who purposefully takes advantage of people emotionally, psychologically, or physically. There is no way this matches up with the Word and will of God.

Don't just be a kind human, be a loving human too. Be a considerate being. Acknowledge others in what you do just as you do for yourself. Don't initially be the reason why someone has pain in their lives. Be the person who builds others up and shows them that they are loved because God deems them worthy of His love.

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To The One Who Wanted To Give Up

I…have...been...there and it sucks!

I wish I could perform a psychological surgery and remove this depressive mental state away. But...it doesn't work that way.

They have all sacrificed everything for me. Each person I have mentioned has laid down everything in hopes of seeing me and seeing me live this life to the fullest.

It was the reminder that my mother and father sacrificed their comfortable home in Ghana for my education, joy, and success. It was the reminder that my brother, though 9 years younger than me, looks up to me and wants to see me make it in everything I set my mind to. It was the reminder that all the beautiful humans that called me friend valued the genuine smile they initially fell in love with. It was the reminder on the day that she left this earth, the day my grandmother completed her mission, that I recalled that nothing, absolutely nothing, in this world would make her happier than to see me ( broken, hurting, and ratchet in all) living a life that is filled with joy and hope.

I..have...been...there.

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Stop Playing the Victim Card

It's over. You and I cannot play the victim when tragedy hits. Even if 90% of the problem falls on the other person, 10% is still on you. You and I are no victims.

24 years of living on this earth, I will tell you that this victim mentality stumps your growth, creates chaos, and destroys you from within. It's toxic and we can't play this divisive game any longer.

Gossiping has got to go! You and I need to develop an allergic reaction towards bitter and negative speech, prideful acts, and the blame game. We are children of God. We don't get to act like this anymore.

It didn't work for Adam and Eve, did you really think it would work for you?

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Child, Remember Your Training

Spiritual training is pretty similar to the conditioning I had as an athlete. In order to make your training effective, you must be willing to sacrifice your time and pleasure for the game. This means more prayer, devotionals, fellowshipping, and anything your soul requires for you to do.

As you begin to prioritize your healing process and your self-love, you allow the power of truth, confidence, and joy back into your life. But the truth is meant to share. Confidence is meant to be displayed. Joy is meant to be given away. As you work your spiritual and mental muscles to overcome the mental stage that is hurting you, you begin to acquire new weapons for the battles you may face.

When I felt low, when you felt stuck mentally or spiritually, I began to remove anything and everything that was causing me pain. I had to clear out the virus by applying a vaccination called Jesus.

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