Bold Surrender : The End of Me & Beginning of Him


"I don't know what I'm doing Jesus!"

Welcome to the bold surrender. Where you realize that you are no longer enough. Welcome to the end of you and the beginning of Him.

You are not enough!

I know this is sound a bit different from my typical tone, but again, I refuse to live in lies and will choose to speak the truth even if my voice shakes. So today I'm going to tell you the truth that will make or break your faith: bold, unexplainable, unapologetic surrender and trust.

As I've stated before, there is no way you and I can seek the face of God and please the Lord without faith. Works are the fruit of faith (The Book of James said it). If you work for the Lord, but your heart and your faith are lukewarm (wow, look at the Holy Spirit pulling out phrases of Scripture left and right) then you're screwing it up. (Yes, today all bets are off, and I'm speaking without holding back.)

The Book of James says a lot. I mean look at James 2: 14 -26 where many believers get the saying, "faith without works is dead (v. 17)." But I've been challenging myself and asking God to push me further into the Word. Not just in reading more of it and hear the Word of God like James 1:22 - 25 says but to really grasp the meaning and the message that God is relating through his Scripture and implementing them into my daily life. But, this cannot be done until you meet the end of yourself.

See we've got it twisted (at least I know that I did). As people, when chaos hits, we begin to try and figure out what we can do solve whatever the conflict is. We go into this hyper-focused mode when a spiritual battle arises. But if there is anything I've learned, the battle is a distraction.

Are you keeping up with me? Good!

See, I believe that the beauty of the moments when our lives feel like they have been thrown into the fire is where we focus our eyes on who we're with. Do you know how I've been talking about the book of James through this post? Well, throughout my Christian life, I have realized that the moments when all hell seems to be breaking loose are my make or break moments. ( I cannot wait to till I get more in detail with you guys about these moments of my life in later posts!)

The times when it seems like everything and anything wrong can and will happen are in fact my favorite times of my life. I look back, and those are the moments when God showed me his power, love, and authority. The broken and shattered moments of my life are where God took his unconditional love and displayed how that love continues to protect and provide for me. The times when I experienced the most hurt, pain, and suffering were when I became most aware of the grace, mercy, and undeniable passion of God.


It was when I boldly surrendered that I finally got the message:

"I love you. I have and will always love you. You are never going to be enough when it comes to the battles that have been set before you. Your abilities are minuscule in comparison to your obstacles and my power. But darling, I love you so much. I'm madly obsessed with your crazy self, and this love isn't going anywhere! I will fight these battles for you. I have armies among armies geared up and ready to slay your enemies. You just need to sit yourself down and trust me. Understand that at the end of you, darling, that's when I begin. I've got this child. So let me do what I do best, and you do what I've been training you to do: trust me."

Bold surrender.

Throwing in the white flag and saying, "God I cannot do this without you," doesn't make sense but following Christ doesn't make sense, my friends. Surrendering to God when people start giving you their opinions and advice doesn't make sense. Keeping still in the middle of a storm when everyone is packing up and making moves doesn't make sense. Displaying the spirit that Job had when everyone told him to curse God wouldn't make sense. But that's what it means to follow Christ: you're faith, decisions, and life wouldn't make sense.

Bold surrender.

Your power will only take you so far. You are human and as beautiful as you are, you are not enough. Your plans and your solutions will fail you. You are not enough for this life you've been called to live. Harsh fact nevertheless facts. The sooner we accept this, the better because you and I will continue to chase our tails trying to take on life by ourselves. We will continue to fail time and time again until we get the message that the only way we can win at life is when we get to the end of us and let him begin to take over.

So surrender to love. Surrender to grace, mercy, passion, unwavering peace, and abundance joy. Surrender to the one that doesn't make sense to the world. Surrender and experience the magnitude of his undeniable power. You will see what true faith (given by God himself) is capable of when it is put into action (surrender).

' Consider it nothing but joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you fall into various trials. Be assured that the testing of your faith [through experience] produces endurance [leading to spiritual maturity, and inner peace]. And let endurance have its perfect result and do a thorough work, so that you may be perfect and completely developed [in your faith], lacking in nothing.'

- JAMES 1:2-4 (AMP)

' Understand this, my beloved brothers and sisters. Let everyone be quick to hear [be a careful, thoughtful listener], slow to speak [a speaker of carefully chosen words and], slow to anger [patient, reflective, forgiving]; for the [resentful, deep-seated] anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God [that standard of behavior which He requires from us]. So get rid of all uncleanness and all that remains of wickedness, and with a humble spirit receive the word [of God] which is implanted [actually rooted in your heart], which is able to save your souls. But prove yourselves doers of the word [actively and continually obeying God’s precepts], and not merely listeners [who hear the word but fail to internalize its meaning], deluding yourselves [by unsound reasoning contrary to the truth]. For if anyone only listens to the word without obeying it, he is like a man who looks very carefully at his natural face in a mirror; for once he has looked at himself and gone away, he immediately forgets what he looked like. But he who looks carefully into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and faithfully abides by it, not having become a [careless] listener who forgets but an active doer [who obeys], he will be blessed and favored by God in what he does [in his life of obedience].'

- JAMES 1:19-25 (AMP)

' What is the benefit, my fellow believers, if someone claims to have faith but has no [good] works [as evidence]? Can that [kind of] faith save him? [No, a mere claim of faith is not sufficient--genuine faith produces good works.] If a brother or sister is without [adequate] clothing and lacks [enough] food for each day, and one of you says to them, “Go in peace [with my blessing], [keep] warm and feed yourselves,” but he does not give them the necessities for the body, what good does that do? So too, faith, if it does not have works [to back it up], is by itself dead [inoperative and ineffective]. But someone may say, “You [claim to] have faith and I have [good] works; show me your [alleged] faith without the works [if you can], and I will show you my faith by my works [that is, by what I do].” You believe that God is one; you do well [to believe that]. The demons also believe [that], and shudder and bristle [in awe-filled terror--they have seen His wrath]! But are you willing to recognize, you foolish [spiritually shallow] person, that faith without [good] works is useless? Was our father Abraham not [shown to be] justified by works [of obedience which expressed his faith] when he offered Isaac his son on the altar [as a sacrifice to God]? You see that [his] faith was working together with his works, and as a result of the works, his faith was completed [reaching its maturity when he expressed his faith through obedience]. And the Scripture was fulfilled which says, “Abraham believed God, and this [faith] was credited to him [by God] as righteousness and as conformity to His will,” and he was called the friend of God. You see that a man (believer) is justified by works and not by faith alone [that is, by acts of obedience a born-again believer reveals his faith]. In the same way, was Rahab the prostitute not justified by works too, when she received the [Hebrew] spies as guests and protected them, and sent them away [to escape] by a different route? For just as the [human] body without the spirit is dead, so faith without works [of obedience] is also dead.'

JAMES 2:14-26 (AMP)

I'll leave you with a truth I hold dear:

Don't do anything for the Kingdom of God that the Lord hasn't asked you to. Don't pull a David and try to build a kingdom for God if the Lord has given that mission to Solomon. Don't try and be like Saul, who instead of waiting on the Lord faced his own demise by taking things upon himself. Listen and be attentive to the Holy Spirit at all times.

Watch out for the moments when you experience trials and tribulations in your life because the battles aren't the focus, God is. You will fail every challenge you face, and you will lose everything if you don't refocus and allow God to do what only He can do. He deserves the glory at the end of the obstacle so let the Lord take charge. Sit back and wait because darling you're about to see what happens when a child of God boldly surrenders and what the Father is capable of when His child places their faith and trust in Him and his unconditional love.

Until next time…

-🌿 Abigail