Darling, It's Time to Light It Up!


Why am I doing this?

With each passing week, I aim to write pieces that are meaningful, honest, and as transparent as possible. But just like any person who is willing to put thoughts into words, I get stuck from time to time. Yes, I face writer's block. (Sometimes, I get these for weeks!)

Whenever I get to the point where I feel as if all the brain juice is gone, I ask myself the question I began with, "why am I even doing this?" I ask myself, "Why did I begin? What was the goal? What is God pushing me to do with this?"

See, as a follower of Christ who writes blog posts (can you tell I'm trying not to call myself a Christian blogger; titles can be overwhelming sometimes), I cannot and will not write a post for anyone to read unless I sincerely sense that God has given me the permission to do so. And today, I want to write about learning to turn on the light.

As previously stated, I'm all too familiar with depression, and it's no fun guys. It's one of the hardest, unpleasant, and painful states you can ever allow yourself to be in. Based on my experience, I will say that depression can be self-inflicted. And as I continue to pour into my self-love and love on others, I have come to learn that these two quotes are as real as life itself:

“Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.”

― J.K.Rowling, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

"And those who were willing to face the darkness, bring the best of themselves to the light- for the world.

― Mrs. Which, Madeleine L'Engle, A Wrinkle in Time

With each step I take in my self-love journey, I've come to realize that the difference between being in the state of depressing and overcoming depression rests in the power I believe and know I have. (Mind you, everyone's different when it comes to depression like previously stated in any mental health posts, I am speaking on my own experiences.)

As a believer, I felt ashamed even to bring up the fact that I was facing a depression. I mean, it's hard to picture someone who has salvation but is mentally falling apart due to depression. I came to realize no matter who you are or what you are, darkness doesn't discriminate.

Though, it seems to me that when a person isn't in sync with who they are, always been (the positive part), how much they're loved, and the level of power given to them, they fall apart.

'“You are the salt of the earth; but if the salt loses its flavor, how shall it be seasoned? It is then good for nothing but to be thrown out and trampled underfoot by men. “You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do they light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.'

- Matthew 5:13-16 (NKJV)

I have seen people, including myself, lose themselves because something wasn't registering right. For me, it was all the above (previous paragraph), and boy am I grateful for the devotion that my church leaders, friends, family, and God had. And the amount of love everyone poured into me even when I wasn't at my best. So let me tell you some daily things I say to myself to keep the positive mojo flowing and keep all the negativity as far as Pluto is from the Sun:

1| Darkness comes to all but doesn't overtake all

Being a believer doesn't excuse me from depression. In fact, spiritual warfare is something Christian's must be aware of and fighting against. However, I know that the power that Christ has resides within my soul thanks to the Holy Spirit. If Jesus can overcome everything (hell and back), then I was born to slay darkness!

2| I have the power of light within me because it came with the salvation package.

Similar to every sin once committed, the lie we believe in is that we are the only ones. But the truth is we're not. We all face battles in life, and though everyone's storm may look different, we are all warriors. Use your resources and those who love you because we're meant to build each other up.

3| Define success and live it! Live purposefully and live authentically.

Success is based on each person. What you may consider a successful life is different from what someone else will find as such. When you are able to determine what success is to you, live it! Don't let anything take your eyes off those goals and the purpose God has given you. If anything distracts you from living your authentic life the way God wants you to, it will bring you down. Trust who made you and who you are.

4| Live for you, live for all and be the light!

The scariest thing to me (I know I get scared of a lot of things; I am a certified scaredy cat) is to live a life that doesn't pour into others. Though, to live a life that lights up those around, I must live each moment of my life as the light I was designed to be. See, darkness (depression) is something that occurs outside of who we are. As believers, we are light and similar to what J.K and Madeleine L'Engle said, the way we are able to escape the darkness and live a life of fulfillment is by turning on our light and being genuine about who we are.

Remember how I began this post with the question I ask myself when I get stuck? Well, let me tell you why I started.

You know that I began because this is my safe space to overcome darkness and embrace my faith and my self-love. Well, it was this quote by Marianna Williamson that God used to save me:

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness
That most frightens us.
We ask ourselves
Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small
Does not serve the world.
There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking
So that other people won’t feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine,
As children do.
We were born to make manifest
The glory of God that is within us.
It’s not just in some of us;
It’s in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine,
We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we’re liberated from our own fear,
Our presence automatically liberates others.
— Marianne Williamson

So no matter where you are in life, what you've been through, what you've experienced, and what you believe (negatively) about yourself, I want you to know that you were born with a light inside of you. You were created to light up all those who come in contact with you. Your existence is meant to brighten up the lives of others.

Stay in connection with your Creator. Embrace the fact that you are stronger than all the darkness life can throw at you. No person or thing can take this light from you. Just turn on your light even in the darkest hour, you will shine! And by being the best unapologetic version of yourself, you will not only overcome this darkness but everything that stands in your way. Trust me, I've been there and darling, believe me when I say you were meant to outshine this darkness!

Until next time…